He was a champion and I was just never going to be like him. I run slower, I’m not as deadly with my blows and I’m weak and perhaps a little bit lazy. But even though he got
there sooner than I did, Jesus?… I won.
I did. And it doesn’t feel high to feel like this. In fact, it feels half lousy because I took a few spills along the way, then I won over my older Brother who I love. I won because I was smarter than He was, I knew where to hit Him and I knew it would hurt deeper than a killer like He could be with His word.
Jesus…it was with medicine of word that He spoke. It was enough to perform miracles and I believe in miracles because I’ve seen them in serendipitous moments that time can’t explain. I’ve seen magic and though it wasn’t really real, I can’t explain everything and I had magic for a moment. And for this moment, just this One?
I still believe. I can’t really tell you exactly why, but there is something pretty miraculous about this life they named Stephanie M Bird. You too, I imagine. And if you are mad at me for some reason that you’ve never said aloud? Do tell, I already feel sorta lousy about winning over my older brother and it’s probably good to hear it now rather than later.