I had a whole story to tell you this morning, but I suppose the real reason that I write to you all is grace. I even want compassion and love for my own story. That’s the simple truth, except I don’t want to tell stories anymore to receive that grace and I don’t want to beg. I just want that feeling to run through you unconditionally when we meet again, if we do..

Attempting to gracefully write everyday about unconditional love, I really DO get that I have not been graceful with everyone. I’ve written whole short stories about how truly ungraceful I can be. After considering those stories and applying the above text from A Course in Miracles, in just two paragraphs I am humbled and brought to my knees by all the child-like mischief and stories.

Today, this post in the sand of my time is for me as much as it is for you because to be honest, I will probably read it more than a few times today to remind me that it can only be but myself that I crucify

  • When I wrote “bad” online reviews for “old companies” that sent peace officers to my home, it can only be but myself that I crucified.
  • When I wrote some truly “horrible” things about others and their own health habits, it can only be but myself that I crucified.
  • When I wrote how truly painful all those emotions felt inside, then got dramatic as I excommunicated others from my life, it can only be but myself that I crucified.

That’s the simple lesson isn’t it = It can only be but myself that I crucify. Even everyday I clicked publish on these real-life stories that you will probably never read again. This one must be for you because you are reading it for the limited edition version that it is.

Lately, I am filtering through everything that I have ever written. It’s weird to see my own stories in all this priceless poetic jibberish with little to no value. Sure, there were a lot 0′ likes on some of those old posts and even some really great comments of support, but what was that all worth?

At the time, it was priceless (to me). Random loved ones ‘likes’ and support helped me to understand that I wasn’t alone in this online journal called a Cloud. When people at least agreed with me, I felt appreciated for being vulnerable. And, I’m not sure that those old agreements have as much value today because who knows if we still agree.

Those beautiful stories don’t feel of much value to anyone either. Thus, all the stories that were once available to you here are gone today and that’s just the way it’s probably going to be for a lifetime of limited edition art. Priceless stories that can only be mine, and it is but myself that I crucify.

Steph Bird


Lesson 20180714:

It can be but myself I crucify..

  1. When it is firmly understood and kept in full awareness, you will not attempt to harm yourself, nor make your body slave to vengeance. You will not attack yourself, and you will realize that to attack another is but to attack yourself. You will be free of the insane belief that to attack a brother saves yourself. And you will understand his safety is your own, and in his healing you are healed.
  2. Today’s idea is one step we take in leading us from bondage to the state of perfect freedom. Let us take this step today, that we may quickly go the way salvation shows us, taking every step in it’s appointed sequence, as the mind relinquishes its burdens one by one. It is not time we need for this. It is but willingness.For what would seem to need a thousand years can easily be done just one instant by the grace of God.


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Sure, we will be attracted to other people. Always. That’s an absolute rule of life. Maturity, or growth, or awareness, or whatever you want to call it, has taught me that sexual desire is needed. Releasing expectation, it is the transition that occurs from fleeting uncertainty and the excitement of new love, to a feeling that is peaceful, and calm and serene. That form of peace has often been taught to us as being the death of connections, but I am 100% certain of seeking life and love.

Love is an immersion and a deeper love than we ever knew possible. It’s the transition from “I wanna hump your brains out” to “I want to learn how to make our heart feel safe and loved, as well as my own.” 

Partners ~>

We are each other’s best : friend. We have each other’s back. We are solid. Everything else is figure-out-able. What emerges from beyond the storm of chemistry, is a deeper feeling of love, trust and understanding, that requires surrender in order to be enjoyed.


Stephan:ie B!rd

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