Deck#1:Card_One_

Deck#1:Card_One_

Here i gOooo…

Creating things? I.t.s healing to me. It’s white and blackbird of me. It’s artistic, autistic, and BEautifully uniquely “me”. This is Card#One of Birdanity Deck#One titled “Take My Hand 🤚 & RUN 🏃‍♀️ 🏃 ♪( ´θ`)”

Secret? I made it when I was trying to figure out my heart conditioning. It’s when I was healing from the last heart break. It’s ARTfully weird?

Deck#1:Card_One_

“Take my hand 🤚 and run 🏃 🏃‍♀️”

<Ka!Ka!🦅 >

#birdanity #birdanityart #birdanitygame #birdanitywords #notforsaleortrade #copywrongtowrite #write #create #art #artoninstagram #birdanitytarot4kids_deckOne_cardOne #cardgames #games #gamestop #love #kidsgames #spiritforkids #spirit4kids #stillblessedyogi @stillblessedyogi #warrior #warriorsgame #lovingkids #lovinglife #lovinhwhatido #lovingwhoiam #lovingwhoimbecoming #lovingwhoyouare #insideandout #naturelovers #comfortableinmyownskin #skin #bruised #hurtinginside #kaka! #birdspirit #birdanityspirit

Rev’d_Bird, “It’s almost over”

Rev’d_Bird, “It’s almost over”

 

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“It’s almost over,”

And with that day, I can breath a sigh of relief. My life today as I know it is almost over. It’s not that far away, The End.

The end isn’t that far. I sense it more than I see it, but I’ve observed it too. The world is burning up. It is a revelation to watch my world today, and as I know it, come to an end. To wake up with all this violence and chaos.

I watch the violence everyday, I feel it, I hear it, I sit with it, all day, everyday. There is nothing I can do, but breath a sigh of relief that my life with violent people, and life as I knew it has ended.

But, that’s only just the beginning. I expect miracles.

Pivoting a bit to miraculous people? They discuss suicide all around me. Friends, friends of friends, family even. They tell me things they wouldn’t normally say to anyone.

Stranger than fiction, they trust me, so they tell me a lot. Sometimes that “a lot” includes stories of planned suicide or feeling suicidal. In any case, listening to those “confessions” of wanting to end a life, I feel like a priest to the God of their understanding and my own. I am a god to those confessions of future planned criminal activities.

Making this The End of that story. I am still alive, but it’s The End of my story as it was. This story @Birdanity even.

Yesterday, when I identified myself as a Religious Organization in my tribe, my society, it was a re-categorization of this human. And that felt like The End of my story as it was in all those previous categories that I identified with, including Art, Artist and Education.

Today…I’m starting my next life, even as I seek medical attention for what ails me in this society and culture that seeks advice from “experts”. I also have to really consider my next steps today. Humbly and faithfully, considering today, and in The End of my days and life here as I know it kind of way.

God, it really does feel like I am living in The End. Observing people, like me, do awesome things with this life, there’s also a lot of despair and pain too. There’s a lot of abusive words being used, a lot of passionate aggression, a lot of anger and resentment being kept overnight, followed by long periods of ex-communication.

God, there are a lot of crazy stories about burning. A lot of running, pain-filled people who can’t forgive. Some humans even get tattoos of burning birds on their arms that say things like, “PAIN = LOVE”. It’s painful just to see those humans in pain everyday.

In this life or the next, they can’t forgive overnight and so they burn. And I burn with them too. But, that life is over. This is The End for me, and that feels true somehow. It feels like I am at the end of that legacy version of me.

I feel it, I’ve sensed it for quite some time now and this is The End 

(of this paragraph)

Are you ready?

I am.

~Rev’d_Bird

(“The Scribe who expected miracles”)

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Free.. as a Bird?

Free.. as a Bird?

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Is this “my happy place”?

Everyone needs a happy place. I do, and lately I’m not sure where I live anymore. Is this my happy place?

Having lived in Cardiff-by-the-Sea for a couple of years now in this California adventure, this life I lead may seem close to a Disneyland experience, but it doesn’t feel that way today. Instead, I’m waking up at 4am and wondering whether I should even get out of bed anymore. I’m staring up at the dark silhouette of a popcorn ceiling, realizing who I am as this human that people call “Steph”, then closing my eyes and wishing for my own Disneyland.

But, no fuzzy sweatshirt or old memory from Disneyland is going to fix the way this life feels today. Nothing is going to fix “me”, I’ve never been to Disneyland and I was never totally broken. But I have been feeling these energy shifts in the Universe and it almost feels like an Earth quake in my life is coming. I can feel “her” power and these cracks are showing the stories rippling through me.

Time being ever present, today’s focus in my personal life will be to apply for at least One “new” job today. That’s the goal, applying for One “different” job with my handy-dandy resume and cover letter. One job at a time, one resume at a time, one day at a time and until my days are over, that’s going to be my personal life.

Splitting this altar ego, today’s focus in my professional life will be to apply myself at my One job today. A job here at ? where. That’s the goal, applying myself at my One job.

…today I will move (away). Today I will find? Disney’s land…

 

~Steph Bird

p.s…

(“You’re not allowed to officially or even unofficially move to Disneyland or even be “Birdanity” yet. You don’t make any money at Birdanity! So how’s that life going to work for YOU? How is this work to YOU?!?”

I’m not sure yet, but this feels like charity (work). This thing called Birdanity that I created several moons ago, this word I invented, this journal that you are reading, and this equal pay = equal work thing that I believe in…this work?

As a human Bird, I’m not a popular invention yet. Probably because I’m free as a Bird and quite frankly, one that keeps getting sick. Almost healthy, my life is… sick!

but it’s still 5am…

time to stare up…

at the ceiling again…

dreaming of a day…

someday….

when ‘I am’ with ‘You’

(again)

big_SUR_sir?

big_SUR_sir?

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This writing thing, this dreaming of being a writer thing, it all started in Big Sur (several years ago). I need to be back there again. Today, I feel like I need to be in a beautiful place again. There is something special to me there and I need something special.

About me? I don’t want to write this art anymore either, these stories about me and these stories about my life’s work. I don’t even want to express my personal life. I want to let go of writing for a little while and just go away to write somewhere about wandering around in nature. That’s what I need – nature – feeling natural around a community of natural people.

There is something wrong with you…

Can You hear me?

Do you read me?

Do You copy?

My friend “E” tells me that she things there is a major energy shift and because she was sick all last night too. After being so ill for such a long time… I told her it was a dream to leave too. To run, I need an adventure for a while, and to disconnect from the lights and the sounds and the…to be with new friends or maybe just one old one that i haven’t seen for a while.

Maybe I need to be like Jesus for a while with Forty days of “my life on the road” or “out in the wilderness” would be nice too. Being a young writer, trying to take off. Where do I go?

When Birdanity is where I took off already.

Do you see “me” here?

Birdanity is my Book of Life. It’s also a complete and accurate historical record of this life as One wo/man they named,

~Stephanie Bird~

p.s. my head hurts will all these words, brain synapses and connections that never existed before. It’s a nightmare of wires up there, but it’s me (steph bird, your friend?

r…not?

and… why?

is that?)

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Steph_Bird_MOVES? 2_Birdanity.com!

Steph_Bird_MOVES? 2_Birdanity.com!

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I know you may not know me yet,

but after this entry You will. I am not a servant, I am a God of servants and that’s me, in a nut shell. Birdanity was never about “me”. It was about “you” and reflecting my experiences with You. It was creatively writing to release these internal traumas that feel so fierce, they must flow through me. You are all God’s to me and I am just a writer to this plural number of gods and goddesses.

Gods and goddesses?

I told you that I owned “Birdanity” before we started this little adventure, but you really own it. I told you that it was copywrite in every possible way, and you laughed at me inside. I am a Spirit here, I am a Creator here, and I am a mess too (with you).

Birdanity? On the outside you may have smiled and even nodded your head in agreement, but inside you laughed and never looked me up because I never mentioned that I had millions of lovely followers just like me, millions of hits, millions of views and billions of life forms that are available to laugh with me too. I never mentioned all that because I didn’t need to, you already knew with your own audience of __#___?

Birdanity? I owned “me”, and my personal time. I own Birdanity in my personal time, which is for free and always will be. Free time is me time. Free time is also “we” time. It’s free for you to visit this site, it’s free for you to see me, and I intend to keep it that way for quite a while.

A coach by trade, I am a coach in every possible way. I may not be Triathlete-certified, but I am a coach too in this medicine of word. I am a consultant, I am a friend, and I am a love. People even ask me to coach them in my “we” time, and they do it all the time. Lawyers, judges, owners, lovers, friends, they all want something, don’t they? Human Resources…

They want knowledge. They want friendship, and they don’t want to have to pull out their wallet to get a peace of friendly advice they may or may not take.

Fiduciary advice? Don’t ask if that’s what you want. Not from a friend, no. That’s pretty much how we all roll these days, as most lawyers do together as friends in this criminally UNJUST system. But I’m no lawyer and I never ate that bar of academia they were trying to push at me.

Legal counselor?

Not even a little,

no thank you,

“But I have heard from a lawyer friend and he said…”

That’s just it, isn’t it?

How we give friendly legal advice?

Enough is enough.

I know who I am, do you?

And, I am looking for a new:

job.

location.

life.

Outlook.

Vacation.

WAY_OUT!

WEST..I guess..?

“Home is where the heart is,” they say….

~Stephanie Bird

p.s. tonight, I begin a career journey to somewhere old and new. Tonight is the moment that I begin to look at my life differently. Tonight is when I listen to the songs of my Youth, and the moment where I stop looking back to December of years ago when this old job felt fancy and the people I met felt phenomenal. Tonight is the moment that I search, when and where I will find?

You, again…

I am always following You, aren’t I? No matter where I go… I’m always looking for You everywhere I go and God, you look an awful lot like a child of God? to me. Beautiful in every possible way, you are my equal and I miss You and what You felt like to sleep near as a human here on Earth.

I need you,

Who? The voice of truth, it tells me a different story about names. The voice of truth says…

Oh what I would do to have

The kind of faith it takes

To climb out of this boat I’m in

Onto the crashing waves

To step out of my comfort zone

Into the realm of the unknown where Jesus God is

And SHe’s holding out His hand

But the waves are calling out my name

And they laugh at me

Reminding me of all the times

I’ve tried before and failed

The waves they keep on telling me

Time and time again. “Boy, you’ll never win!”

“You’ll never win!”

But the Voice of Truth tells me a different story

The Voice of Truth says, “Do not be afraid!”

And the Voice of Truth says, “This is for My glory”

~Casting Crowns – Voice Of Truth Lyrics

p.s.S. this is for all the glory…

this is it

the apocolypse?

Welcome to the new “free” age of Birdanity, where……

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people_don’t_*YELL*?

people_don’t_*YELL*?

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Bosses don’t… YELL?!?…

No, they don’t and they shouldn’t. When/if they cannot control their temper and when interactions become so heated that they reach out and slap you with their words by way of their yelling, it’s considered abuse. It’s highly sensitive, it’s highly emotional, it may even be understandable when sHE becomes HEated, and it’s?

Abuse.

It is.

It always will be.

Period.

End of story.

but wait…

Dear Sirs,

or madams,

Who? YELL,

You are abusive!

I tried to tell “you”!

I tried to meditate with “you”!

I tried to be quiet and listen!

I even tried to tell “you” to stop!

I told you yelling was UNHEALTHY!

I told you in all the ways…

I could remember to tell..

and?

In my own way,

I tried to stop you!

BUT

You didn’t know how to…

Non-violently communicate

YOU didn’t know how to…

Listen….

&_Now…

I AM A

VICTIM…

again…

again..

again?

OF?

ABUSIVE?

Daughters &

Sons…

Who were also?

Absued.

Absuited.

Abused.

Abusers.

Bullies.

Mean boys!

Mean girls?

When it happens?

Remember,

“I AM A

VICTIM…

again…

again..

again?

OF?

ABUSE!”

Speak UP!

Or fore!/ever hold your peace?

(THIS IS Magic to YOU?!?!?!?!? It’s….non-violent communication RAINBOWS to me!)

That’s what this is!

Rainbows about?

Yelling!

No more

Angry yelling!

Say you’re sorry?

“BOSS”?

FREEDOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Is it Time?

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But, who is TIME?…

Time to get to work in my life!
It’s time..?
It’s time…..?
It’s time……….?

“I” came out…
She came out…
He came out…

…to show up in this life. One skin of a gorgeous home and the only One I know and own. Time is really worth nothing here though. I am worth nothing, but time. And my time is worth? Priceless amounts to me alOne, yet my extra time is still worth nothing to them.

“They” are counting my time today and they have been for a life/time. They count to allocate and identify when I am worth diamonds or gold to them. Gender fluidity aside, no one cares about this male and female nature when allocating the resources that I sold, TIME.

Though they want my time in a bad way,

and they even say they need

MORE people like me,

is it wise to be wanted so…

badly?

It’s about Time, that old geaser! And only my dear friend, Time will tell if I am priceless or not to “you”, the reader of this time. My guess is that ‘I am’ worth more than ‘Father Time’.

Just a guess..

~Steph Bird